Home

It’s not as simple a concept as it used to be.

Where’s home? Home is where the heart is.

Home is … one’s house?

‘Where you live at a particular time’, says the internet. ‘The physical structure in which one lives; a house or apartment’. Then – perhaps closer to the resonance of the word – ‘A dwelling place together with the family or social unit that occupies it’. ‘An environment offering a sense of security and happiness.’. Warmer. ‘A valued place regarded as a refuge or a place or origin.’ Yes, it’s something like that.

A place of rest and safety?

Home’s a big old concept. And I’ve been out of the UK for all of, ooh, 10 days? And already I feel I’ve lost my certainties as to where exactly ‘home’s located. I fly from Geneva to Gatwick. Am I flying home? Or will I be going home in a day or two, when my work in the UK’s done?

Home’s an emotive word. Don’t use it lightly.

Say ‘I’m going home’, instead of ‘I’m going to mum’s’; ‘I’m going to dad’s’ – and already the emotional landscape’s shifted; an affiliation’s created; a base is established.

But this is a different problem. The problem here is one of not knowing – truly knowing – just where ‘home’ is, and just what makes it so. Trying out one place and the next against the concept of ‘home’, and finding that there’s no clear-cut certainty as to what the ‘right’ answer should be.

The North? No. The place has resonance; yes; I’ve roots there and I always will have. But move ‘back’ there, and I’ll be moving forward – or sideways? – anyway, not ‘coming home’. The ‘family or social unit’ that made the North home is changed.

Oxford? Doesn’t fit, does it. ‘Where you live at a particular time’ – that’s the internet’s no. 1 definition; thank you Google. Well, I don’t live there; it won’t do.

France? ‘A valued place regarded as a refuge or place of origin’. Nope. That’s not working either.

So, where is home? Are any of these places home? Are all of them?

When it comes down to it, I suspect Home is something one carries inside oneself. Figure that one out, and you’re grounded. Find it, and you’ll not be lost again. Can that be right? I hope it is. Am I there? Well, maybe not yet. But perhaps I’m on the right track.